Stories & experiences

PuffNoMore
Southern NSW
6
Stories
30/11/2018
Joined

THE MINDSET

Posted in Getting started 17 Dec 2019
23 Comments

Hi Guys,

The word mindset has been used here quite often.

Wise people have tried to help explain it. Some people can grasp it very easily. Some people cannot. and some people play around with the idea.

I'm almost certain now that the concept of the mindset cannot be taught.

I think its to do with feelings.

It only comes with how the smoker (in this case) feels about Quitting the addiction. The smoker has to eventually come the the conclusion that they want to not smoke. Hoping, wishing, needing or dreaming does not quite meet the criteria of the MINDSET for Quitting. People can Quit through sheer willpower and determination , until eventually they stumble on to the right mindset of not wanting the smoke anymore. Its the great light bulb moment when you know its FREEDOM.

Some have the ability to realize this mindset Straight away. Some people have to fight the cravings for many months.

And most of us fit somewhere in between.

Have a think where you might fit in this spectrum.

To sum up, I hope that you have found the mindset to quit successfully, Its just a switch and belief that can be found within ourselves. And I am hoping we all find that WANT (To not smoke)

PS, I believe that feeling has arrived. (for me)

Thank you for reading and to those who have tried to help me, I understand now

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23 Comments

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  • Safe2017 December 17, 2019 | 22:53
    Hi PuffNoMore,
    You are absolutely right. Mindset is critical. Your want to quit must be greater than your desire to smoke even if by a tiny hair. Along with that practice NOPE - not one puff ever and you should be fine. Good luck.
  • Happiness December 17, 2019 | 23:17
    Yes, I think you hit it PuffNoMore. IT IS A BELIEF in yourself, that you can accomplish this feat and that you WANT to be a non-smoker. ACCEPTING that you will not smoke again. NOPE.

    I did not intend to quit smoking. However, when I saw that it could be done as many were doing it and it sounded so wonderful I had to learn more. Understanding nicotine and what it did to us certainly helped to clear a lot of the fog. Underneath, I had always wished I didn't smoke, but I never thought I had to courage not to. I thought that the nicotine addiction was much stronger than it actually is. It is what is in your head that carries you through. The Battle Is Won In The Mind, as a dear member said.

    I am so happy for you PuffNoMore, that your struggle was not in vain. Pure grit and determination have given you the perseverance to fight this through and finally you have found the right key in which to unlock that door which as kept you prisoner, like I , for decades.

    I sometimes feel bad with words like "quitting smoking can be easy" knowing that for some it is not. We are here to encourage, not discourage and the fact is it is not a lie. Every quit is different but in the end if the truth is known, the will is there and the want is more than the desire to smoke, it should hold true.

    You are finally here PuffNoMore. You can succeed and you will!
  • PuffNoMore, Southern NSW December 17, 2019 | 23:32
    Hi Safe
    Its a belief system, it has to come from within yourself. Its when the addicted fully realizes that they want to not smoke. I think its an emotional decision not to smoke anymore. Take the science and the common sense out of it, because, everybody knows and wishes to not smoke.
    Its a spiritual thing inside ourselves that we have to harness to truly WANT to not smoke.
    I hope that doesnt sound too loopy? lol
    There's alot of people I admire on here and you are one of those,,,,,I have hoped that someone would encourage you to open up a little more, but, I suppose you will remain our mysterious safe haven?
    THANK YOU SAFE
  • PuffNoMore, Southern NSW December 17, 2019 | 23:39
    Hi happ, You know that most people admire you, me included, but boy, that MINDSET is hard to teach, It really does have to come within ones own belief system, otherwise its going to be a difficult Quit, not impossible just difficult
  • Rosie85 December 18, 2019 | 1:37
    I couldn't agree more!!! I thought about quitting many times but I didn't think I could do it, was too scared to try, thought it would be horrible, ect. When I finally decided to go all in, I made up my mind to quit and was determined to stay quit. Family and friends can encourage you to quit but you have to decide for yourself.

    Puff, I absolutely agree that it is something spiritual inside of you that you have to hone in on and believe in. You CAN do this! I know I CAN do this.

    I continue to read through the stories and experiences of the past and present members of this site. It's truly helped me through my own journey to read about other's and how they have managed to stay quit or to read about their triggers and advice. Everyone's journey is different but we all have the same goal in mind.

    SO thank you all for helping me along this road to freedom!

  • Happiness December 18, 2019 | 2:23
    Where do you find the belief? Does it just pop into your head one day?

    Maybe the need or want or wish to quit hits and you finally take some positive measures like finding a quit group. It was not until then that I had the Belief that I could quit. Seeing is believing. Learning the tools to use starts to form a plan. Deciding to put them into action. All steps to becoming free from nicotine. Understanding of the addiction, and how it affected you. Knowing you, through others stories and relating. All are a part of learning how to beat the devil.
    Yes, the mindset is taught. Facts are put forth. Accept or discredit. It is a process. I cannot change a mind unless you want me to. I am not a drug, only a voice of reason.
    You see how others feel about quitting smoking and how they would never go back. How it changed lives and how grateful we are. But we cannot change your feelings. Even when we feel so much for you.
    Learning the truth about what nicotine did, and that it is not as strong as we were led to believe. We wanted to believe that. It gave us an excuse to smoke for we feared the thought of quitting. We didn't believe we could, so we didn't want to try. Not until you learn these things can one admit that we were duped and that it is time we faced the facts and did something. Desire to control our own lives again and to be free of the expense, ill health, smell and time taken to feed an addiction that gave us absolutely nothing in return.
    Yes the mindset is taught. It is up to you whether to Believe in it and yourself.
  • Red-67 December 18, 2019 | 10:11
    Yep, For me, mindset was just making them something I did not want, and not something I could not have. And, letting go of, the illusion of anything good, about smoking.
    And yes, LOL, we are all for snorting chicken soup :)
  • Pisces24, Central Coast December 18, 2019 | 11:53
    I was always too afraid to even try. Never have tried. I didn't think I could be strong enough. I'm a long way from "there" but I'm there because I don't WANT to smoke.
    My brain keeps reminding me to get a cigarette and I ignore it. Hard sometimes but so far so good...
    I too am grateful for your advice and encouragement from lots of forum friends. You don't have to go it alone.
  • John 100 December 18, 2019 | 14:31
    Good to see you back, your right mindset is critical to giving up. You can do it, just believe in yourself. Giving up is probably the best Christmas present you could give yourself. Stay strong and have a great Christmas.
  • PuffNoMore, Southern NSW December 18, 2019 | 14:40
    I appreciate that John,
    My old Quit buddy from 2018,,,,,, Good to hear that you are powering along after using that nicotine Quick mist spray to help you reach your goals...
    merry xmas
  • blackboy211 December 19, 2019 | 16:35
    I believe this as well. If you want to quit you have to persuade yourself that you are not missing out on anything by not smoking. In fact you are gaining infinite health benefits by not smoking. When you quit smoking try not to mope about not having a cigarette. Remember a non smoker does not feel the need to have a smoke. Remember your goal is to be a non smoker. People who quit using the will power go through their lives feeling like they are missing out on something. Forever thinking about that old friend. Non smokers don't go through this feeling because they have nothing to miss. They don't yearn for a smoke. It's about changing your brain washing. I mean you feel withdrawals but this is proof that it is working. This is proof that you are alive and your body is healing and moving forward past this. Stay strong my friend.
  • PuffNoMore, Southern NSW December 19, 2019 | 17:08
    I really like how you have hit the nail on the head with a number of good points.
    But I think I will try to welcome the withdrawal or cravings as proof that my body is ridding its self of poisons. I tried Quitting last year and I didn't quite let go of that friend and i was constantly missing it .........
    Thank you Blackboy211
    IT IS A MIND GAME
  • Nuts December 19, 2019 | 19:35
    Hi PuffNoMore. When you are thinking about quitting but you cant quite get there, then you dont have the right mindset. I struggled for years after my husband quit. I just couldnt do it. The truth is i didnt really want to quit. Not deep down. My husband never nagged me. He said i would quit when i was ready. I think that the right mindset is really wanting to quit and believing that you can, and a good dose of determination. When i finally decided that i really wanted to quit, i became very determined and i honestly think that helped. I think that you will quit in 2020 and that you will find the right mindset. May you and your loved ones have a very merry Christmas
  • PuffNoMore, Southern NSW December 19, 2019 | 20:46
    hi Nuts,
    I think I'm getting there with my thinking, because I'm looking forward to the withdrawal and the pangs of the pull that the addiction causes.
    I'm not going into this Quit with terror and fear this time. I'm telling the demon to ef off. I will be boss.
    I let the demon control my every thought. I will be much better prepared by actually truly believing in my powers of persuasion. I let my mind feel loss. Rather than embracing the Quit as something wonderful.
    Before, I was like I need to Quit because of this, this and this.
    Now I KNOW I want it , without having reasons for for the Quit.
    I went into it last time with looking for every bit of scientific evidence to give me reasons to Quit, I not only done that because I often look to science to make sense of the world, but, to try and Quell my fear of the Quitting process.
    I took a scientific kind of approach and forgetting about the power of the mind.
    Completely discounted my inner strength too. I didnt use it as if not to take full responsibility for my own thoughts .
    Oh yes, Ive got this
  • Broncor, Mid North Coast December 19, 2019 | 22:29
    you Have got this, a will check in to cheer you on, merry Xmas puffnomore and a happy smoke free new year to us all
  • Happiness December 20, 2019 | 9:08
    Have a very Merry Christmas my friend. You can and you will succeed this time. I am glad that something melted that block which you threw up in self defense a long time ago.
    There really is nothing to fear. You will take those cravings in stride and know you are master. Practice makes perfect and knowledge is power. You've definitely got it this time PuffNoMore. You know when you have turned the corner, you feel it and believe it. I believe you are finally there.
  • Nuts December 20, 2019 | 10:29
    You sound very positive this time . I know that you will do it. Yay for you mate. We are all here for you 👍🤗
  • Happiness January 01, 2020 | 16:49
    Hi PuffNoMore. You asked of Pisces on her "Cold Chicken" page regarding the amount smoked to the ease of quit. I answered with some facts. Why don't you create your own style of quit. Maybe the Duck and Jab.....Cold Duck was a brand of wine decades ago....i don't know if its still around?
  • Broncor, Mid North Coast January 06, 2020 | 22:25
    Thanks for the heads up in regard to nuts one year, I did have it in the back of my mind, but grateful for you reminding me, I will be there soon and you too, we will hang in there for you, stay safe down south there
  • Pisces24, Central Coast January 07, 2020 | 8:34
    This is just such a great Story PUFF...
    Get new quitters to read this..
    Hope you're good...
    🐟
  • PuffNoMore, Southern NSW January 07, 2020 | 13:01
    Thanks to all the great comments!
    I appreciate all of them.
  • Broncor, Mid North Coast January 07, 2020 | 15:25
    Hi puffnomore, glad you are getting away for a few days, it has been quite horrible down south, thankfully most of the smoke has cleared on the North coast, it was bad here in November, hopefully it stays safe and clear. I am a few hours further north, so most likely not possible we will bump into each other this time, it’s very busy here in Coffs Harbour and that usually means we don’t get to travel around this time of year, due to work. I hope you have a lovely break anyway, laureton old bar is beautiful. Keep me posted though on your travels and quit, all the best to you and your family for the new year.
  • PuffNoMore, Southern NSW January 07, 2020 | 15:46
    Yep, for some strange reason I was thinking you were in port. never mind.
    I'll keep a look out for your 1 year achievement.
    Take care Broncor

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