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Dontsmoke
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22/10/2018
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9 month smoke free..Don't know happy or sad

Posted in Quit experiences 13 Jun 2019
13 Comments

I m 9 month away from smoke.. may be its just time that I am feeling very low mentally and emotionally. Getting vision of a quiet and lonely place with no one else but me smoking my frustration off .

I know logically quitting is a right thing but sometimes I am too much lonely and sad to even don't know with whom I can share my feeling . I feel.very weak when I think of starting smoking again in those low life moment but I also feel that I am cheating with myself for not being true that I really need to smoke . I don't have anyone to share my feeling with or without getting judged

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13 Comments

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  • Safe2017 June 13, 2019 | 7:02
    Hi Dontsmoke. You are doing so good being a non smoker. It's awesome because in order to remain smoke free for 9 months it takes a lot of determination and you really got it but going back to smoking will leave you feeling guilty and regretful. Believe me cause I've been there and done that. In the past I had two successful quits. One was for over 2 years before I ruined it by taking one puff and after that one puff immediately I was hooked again for the next 10 years or so. The second serious attempt lasted for over 1 year and once again just one puff got me hooked for more than 12 years. Now I am on my 3rd and final quit and I know that it's NOPE (not one puff ever). However, both times when I restarted smoking the feeling of regret and guilt were just dreadful because right away I knew that I made the worst mistake and I clearly recalled why I had quit in the first place but by then it was too late because I was already hooked. Don't let the same thing happen to you. Loneliness will eventually pass but just imagine how you will feel if you start smoking again - lonely and feeling guilty at the same time. Smoking isn't worth it. Hang in there. Better days will come back. Stay strong and all the best.
  • Happiness June 13, 2019 | 7:10
    Welcome to a new community and friends you can count on when you are feeling low and vulnerable. We don't judge, we simply encourage and can hopefully offer you help if a specific need or question arises. Over time you will come to know us and even feel a connection with some.

    Learning about nicotine is also helpful in keeping your off of it. Understanding you and the relationship you had with it and still apparently do. Those bonds can finally be broken and you can move forward without feeling you are missing a friend. Smoking has never done anything for you. I think you already know that, yet it has taken a few by surprise and to their disgust. I can only admire those who get right back on the horse. Hopefully it will be easier, as you will not forget what you have learned, any more than you can forget what it was like being a non-smoker and the pride and joy and the freedom it gave you.

    So you have come to the right place Dontsmoke, and please do join in with comments and sharing your story. So many look forward to visiting the site to stay in check and respond if needed.

    You have come too far to even think of turning back. Knowledge is power. Quit once and stay quit with the right mindset.
  • Happiness June 13, 2019 | 8:43
    Sorry Ravisca, I didn't realize you changed your name until i also realized that you had posted before. Then i was perflexed as to why i called you Ravisca in commenting on previous stories, only to see other had too.

    Rereading what you wrote may help you to understand from where you came and where you are, and why you feel as you do. You have always seemed a pillar of strenght, strong in the mantra of NOPE and in the conviction that smoking was illogical if not totally unnatural, irrational etc.....

    I am sorry that you miss the working environment and the friends outside your home . I think if you could find ways to fill this void that you may be much more fulfilled in life and happier. Church or volunteering a few hours may bring you some camaraderie. Doing small acts of kindness.... for an elderly neighbour, .... looking good makes one feel good. Just simply smile and the world smiles back!

    Better days ahead my friend. Keep up your great quit and keep on inspiring!
  • softly40, Mid North Coast June 13, 2019 | 10:35
    I just hope I can achieve a 9 month milestone DontSmoke we are all human and have these feelings on and off. Smoking is not the key here, and after getting to know myself some more with many attempts at giving up. I realized that the cigarette had indeed become my friend, not a good one though in fact a very bad one. Please re read Alan Carrs book again at this stage it will help somewhat. Make a list of things you enjoy and can do alone, and also afford and make another list of things to do in a group setting that you enjoy and can afford. This might give you a truer picture of friendship for yourself and others.
  • Nuts June 13, 2019 | 10:44
    You know we dont judge here mate. You should never be unhappy about quitting. Smoking will not make you happy, and deep down, you know that. Stay strong mate. Maybe do some volunteer work and meet some new people.
  • Robn June 13, 2019 | 19:24
    Hi dontsmoke, welcome to our community of like minded people. I don’t think you really want to smoke, it sounds like you are lonely and need some motivation to get out and socialise. Try some volunteer work....there are many people sitting inside their homes that would love someone to share some stories with. Also get up and go for a walk every day....you only need do a half hour walk to make yourself feel better and energised. Perhaps you could get a pet. There is so much going on out there in the world everyday....make yourself a part of it....and you will find you will feel so much better. Stay off the smokes, they never gave you anything positive and they never will. Post on here as often as you can and read the stories....there is so much inspiration to be gained. We will always be here for you and support you.....you can do it because you already are doing it. Chat to you again soon I hope
  • Dontsmoke June 15, 2019 | 18:48
    I am not sure how to share that I am deeply touched by seeing so many around who care to spend their previous time to stop by for me.

    I agree with all of you and infact as i too believe that smoking is not going to help any good to me, it's probably My isolation which is killing me. I never Depended on anyone before but since past some time I have no one who I believe care for my existence.

    I felt good emotionally when I smoke though physically that same monster was eating me inside out but I had company, bad though.

    I had a well paid job and I relocated for my family and took some work from home so that I can stay with my family. Now I am all.alone with no one to speak as the family is too busy with their routine life which for years have been accustomed of not having me on the ground but supporting financially from remote locations with few visits around.

    I don't know whether trading of my dreams to live with family was a right decision or living far off family to chase my dreams was the right one.

    I feel.like a failure. Trying to stay motivated and happy but I am failing to pretend anymore..

    I don't smoke I don't drink . After such a long time working in isolation, I am failing to go out and have friend without benefits.

    Sorry to take ur time but I feel u guys are not judging me here for the way my life.is
  • Safe2017 June 16, 2019 | 0:38
    Nobody is perfect. We all do the best we can under the circumstances. Take care and be kind to yourself.
  • softly40, Mid North Coast June 16, 2019 | 13:56
    Now is the ideal time to look in another direction on your own. You can get out but your thoughts follow you around so this time check out Nature and look at it closley so many interesting things happen before our eyes without us really seeing. When you get back jot down the most interesting aspect of your walk. I have studied Art for over 40 years and Nature (including people) never cease to amaze me.
  • Robn June 16, 2019 | 18:28
    Hi dontsmoke, since you were last on this site, what have you been doing with your days? I hope you have tried getting out a bit and starting some kind of new routine. Perhaps a hobby is something you can help fill the time with...do you like jigsaw puzzles, gardening, cooking....there are all sorts of things to fill your time doing.....you just need to give it some thought. If you are feeling lonely, why not get yourself a pet....they are great companions. Stay positive and strong...smoking was never your friend.....friends don’t hurt you .......smoking does. Take care
  • Nuts June 16, 2019 | 22:08
    Maybe you should talk to your family about your feelings. They may not realize how lonely you are feeling.
  • Nuts June 17, 2019 | 0:09
    I have a beautiful black and white cat. Cats always love a cuddle. Hand in there mate. You will get though this down side in your life. With the money you save from not smoking, you could go on a holiday. Maybe a cruise. Have some fun and meet new people. We are here for you, and we will never judge you or consider you a waste of time
  • Nuts June 17, 2019 | 0:10
    I meant hang in there mate

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