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There has never been a time yet when I felt that I was out of danger but I did hope that by Day 54 I would be starting to feel better. I had a seriously awful day yesterday with tears aplenty for no particular reason. I did the best I could and went to bed early with a sleeping pill. For some peculiar reason, I didn't sleep but did a good meditation this morning to make up for my tiredeness. Then today I had a showdown at work and I just lost it - tears, swearing, stamping of feet and then a long walk with a sympathetic colleague after I threatened that I would quite like a cigarette.
I knew I wasn't going to have a cigarette - but I really, really felt like it. I think it was a bit of a cry for help to those around me, saying "Listen, this aint easy". I suppose, as I have read often on this site, I just have to get through those stressful situations without a cigarette despite the fact that it is the first thing which pops into my mind. I am very resolved but I really wish it might become easier. A friend told me recently that weeks six to twelve were bad but I have heard so many different stories, I suppose I can only track my own one.
It's always good to come here and renew my determination.
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