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sks
Sydney
1
Story
28/07/2021
Joined

I want to quit desperately but not able to quit - can anyone help?

Posted in Getting started 29 Jul 2021
18 Comments

I want to quit smoking and did tried earlier on my own but was never able to stop it. If anyone can help me with how to stop smoking would be of great help. I think it's not possible but still I would like to try and not give up.

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18 Comments

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  • Red-67 July 30, 2021 | 2:22
    Well, you are already setting yourself up to fail. If you really want to quit, you can..
    If you open your mind to the truth, of just how stupid smoking is, you can make them something you no longer WANT. In many, or most cases, a person thinks they want to quit, but at the same time they WANT a cigarette. When you go to light one, take a moment, and just look at that little thing you are letting run your life. Does it really taste that good ? NO ! Does it really do anything for you ? NO ! Stopping is simple. It is your brain, and your hand. If you do not pull one out, stick it in your mouth, and light it, then you will quit. Right ? Sure, you may be miserable for a few days. The physical withdrawal will pass quickly, if you make up your mind that you simply do NOT WANT one..
    The key, is to take control of your brain, back from the addiction.
    SMOKING MAKES YOU STUPID.. I know, I was a stupid smoker for 45+ years. But when my way of thinking changed I decided to quit, and you can do it too..
    I don't believe in TRYING to quit. You either want to smoke, or you don't. Think about it :)
  • Happiness July 30, 2021 | 5:06
    Red67 is absolutely right. We are not trying to be mean , but you will fail with your present way of thinking.

    Read, learn and accept to change your way of thinking. We were drugged by nicotine, and fed lies to accept our addiction. Yes we are addicts! Legal ones but addicts all the same. It was socially acceptable and other smokers made us feel like we must like it. Why else would we do it?
    The withdrawal does last a few days, but we are stronger than nicotine. Nicotine causes the cravings because we do not feed it . It causes the discomfort which are mere thoughts. We have been trained to feed it before those thoughts come creeping in. We don't smoke because we like it, we just don't like how we feel if we don't. We made excuses to smoke because we were addicted and it was easier to give in than to fight back.

    Fight for your freedom. Fight for your hard earned money going up in smoke and your health constantly at risk.

    Feel better, breath easier and feel the pride and confidence once defeating the nicotine addiction. We all started out with doubts, but you have to leave them behind and learn to think positive. There is no reason why you too cannot stop smoking.

    Choose to change your life for the better. Have you ever heard anyone wish they smoked?
  • sks, Sydney July 30, 2021 | 18:35
    @red67 thanks, for the motivation. I will surely try doing what you suggested.
  • sks, Sydney July 30, 2021 | 18:38
    @happiness @red67 100% ! Thanks for taking the time to reply back on my post.
  • Red-67 July 31, 2021 | 1:43
    Now; Don't think trying, or quitting, or sacrificing , or giving up anything..
    Make up your mind,, you simply do NOT WANT to do this any more...
    Sure, you will be miserable for a little while, but you can deal with it just like you would a bad cold, or the flu. It will pass. You will not crave something you do not want :) We let smoking take our brain.. You CAN take it back :)
  • Percy Verence July 31, 2021 | 2:02
    Hi there, SKS!

    I'm only on my second day as a non-smoker but I spent over a week preparing for a smooth take-off. There's a few things I found helpful that you might want to try:

    (1) Get a blank piece of paper and draw a line down the centre. Label the left hand side 'PROs' and the right hand side 'CONs' then list every smoking benefit and drawback you can think of.

    It might seem like a stupid exercise - you can mentally calculate in a few seconds that there are no benefits - but actually going through the process of writing it down and thinking hard about every aspect of your habit puts your brain in the right frame of mind. I pinned mine to my bedroom wall and I read it in the morning as I lay in bed. It reinforces my decision...how could an intelligent, sensible, strong-willed fighter like me be so loyal and protective over a habit that has the potential to obliterate my life? The amount of money I spend on cigarettes every month is tantamount to a second mortgage payment...I spend money on vitamins and health foods to enhance my health and then spend double the amount on something which is a guaranteed fast-track to Cancer and lung disease. Smoking defies logic - it is a vile and damaging addiction, not a life choice. I have accepted that I am an addict because there is no way that I could consciously defend what I'm doing to myself with cigarettes.

    (2) I found the hypnotist, Paul McKenna on YouTube. I played his 'Stop Smoking' meditation every night for about five days before my quit date. I believe it has helped me, so I have linked it here:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VEsOthTgXu4

    (3) You will hear the name 'Allen Carr' mentioned repeatedly here. It's not coincidence that his books are discussed amongst successful quitters - the books are amazing. I gave up smoking about ten years ago with only his book and a bit of will power. He creates a compelling and positive way to view quitting which doesn't involve any feelings of deprivation or loss. I strongly recommend you buy his book. (Yesterday, I saved £20.80 by not smoking - I treated myself to two new Allen Carr books from Amazon.)

    I hope you'll be sharing your quit journey with me soon. Good luck, friend!
  • sks, Sydney July 31, 2021 | 9:30
    @Percy @ Red Thanks, a lot for the tip and motivating words. I will surely give them a try but your words build a lot of confidence to quit this waste out of my life. I am glad to have friends like you on this path. I have chosen 1-Aug as my quit day. Already started preparing for it. I am glad I joined this forum and able to share how I feel. I wish these words could have come from my spouse which could have made me more stronger.
  • Percy Verence July 31, 2021 | 10:33
    @SKS: Is your spouse a smoker? Be prepared for subtle sabotage!!!

    I remember trying to give up many years ago - my husband was a smoker who didn't want to quit. My success made him uncomfortable with his own habit so he used to 'accidentally' leave a pack of ciggies and a lighter on the kitchen table...in my car...by the sofa...or he'd say "Could you carry these in your jacket, hon - they keep falling out of my pocket". :)

    I have no support outside of this forum, either. My best friend is a smoker. If I phoned her in a moment of weakness, she'd be round here before I'd disconnected the call to shove a lit cigarette in my mouth. "Never mind, love - better luck next time". I tried to give up last year and rang her crying on day five - she was here like a St Bernard in a storm with a barrel of tobacco round her neck - bounding to my rescue within minutes.

    My mum is my strongest critic about smoking. She's never smoked or had any experience with addiction so she's taken every opportunity over the last three decades to tell me just how weak and stupid I am. If I'm still not smoking in a few days time, she'll cause a row or go out of her way to upset me so I'll go scuttling back to my addiction. Without it, she CAN'T tell me just how weak and stupid I am... empowering myself will disempower her. I've seen this pattern so many times on previous quits - she's jubilant, victorious and superior when I fail. When I smoke, she berates me for it.

    I'm sharing all this because the one thing I know for sure is that even people that love you are manipulative and have their own agenda. The beauty of this forum is that the only motivation for anybody to be here is to genuinely quit or genuinely help others quit. Give up for YOU and accept that you'll have to fight and win the battle alone. It's your health, your money and your future being stolen by cigarettes - be deaf to anybody else's approval or damnation and marvel at your own strength in the process.

    If you beat this - you'll know you can beat anything. x
  • Happiness July 31, 2021 | 23:27
    When we quit this we feel so good about ourselves and it really is a boost to our ego and confidence. We take pride in our personal accomplishment and feel like we are in control of our lives. We are no longer ruled by addiction, plagued by quilt, destroying our temples and shunned by a majority of the public.

    Those who cannot support an ex-smoker are envious that they haven't found the key to freedom. (if they smoke) or the self confidence to change things in their own lives. Smokers still have to hang on to the belief that they like to smoke, they CHOOSE to smoke and that smoking is some miracle drug. The truth makes us feel stupid, but the truth will set us free.

    All here have found the desire to change. We all like our comfortable ruts and don't usually like change. But some changes are good, and we do adapt. It is easier when we look for the silver lining instead of using resistance. Embrace being a non-smoker.....you will love the changes it brings.
  • sks, Sydney August 01, 2021 | 20:59
    I can't thank you enough to you all for taking out and writing. I am definitely feeling a strong vibe here to quit ( All thanks to God and you appearing as angels in my life. I am able to gather this courage and confidence because of you all) and I am pretty much sure that this time when I give up I don't wanna look back. I am still planning for my quit date but everyday this feeling of over powering my thought of taking one more of cigarette. soon I will put up a date and will start counting from there.
    @Percy, No my spouse doesn't smoke and she hates smokers. And now when I become one she is pretty neutral but sometime she behaves like your mum. At this time I feel so lone struggling and fighting this battle and instances of some arguments compels me to chose this path of smoking. True, that someone who has not done it will not understand the vein of a person going through the constant battle in mind.

    I am excited for new me! A re:birth and a gift to myself and my soul and body. This goes out for my spouse and kid!
  • sks, Sydney August 01, 2021 | 21:11
    I can't thank you enough to you all for taking out and writing. I am definitely feeling a strong vibe here to quit ( All thanks to God and you appearing as angels in my life. I am able to gather this courage and confidence because of you all) and I am pretty much sure that this time when I give up I don't wanna look back. I am still planning for my quit date but everyday this feeling of over powering my thought of taking one more of cigarette. soon I will put up a date and will start counting from there.
    @Percy, No my spouse doesn't smoke and she hates smokers. And now when I become one she is pretty neutral but sometime she behaves like your mum. At this time I feel so lone struggling and fighting this battle and instances of some arguments compels me to chose this path of smoking. True, that someone who has not done it will not understand the vein of a person going through the constant battle in mind.

    I am excited for new me! A re:birth and a gift to myself and my soul and body. This goes out for my spouse and kid!
  • Lia August 01, 2021 | 22:50
    Hi sks.
    Welcome to this forum. All great advice here from the responders to your plea.
    In a nutshell when it comes to cigarettes, one is one too many, 1000 is never enough!
  • sks, Sydney August 02, 2021 | 8:33
    Day one has began. I woke up this morning and somewhere in my mind this strong thought came in to stop it today. It's very hard to stop the morning puff with all the conflict and battle in my mind I won over it. And here I am, not taken my first puff. My packet got finished yesterday night so this morning my brain was pushing me hard to buy that packet and just open and smoke only one cigarette and not to do after that. But this has happened so many times and my brain has tricked me every time on compelling me to buy that packet and me ending finishing it gradually. So this time I stopped the roots. "If I don't have the packet then it's as good as I am not doing it" :-)
    I am really so happy to take this decision and I am feeling so fresh. The air is so fresh. It's a happiness I can't explain. I want to really see more of it ..
    The journey has begun already. God give me strength and all support to fight this evil inside me and everyone.
    God bless everyone! May all beings be happy.
  • sks, Sydney August 02, 2021 | 18:26
    It's almost 19 hours 49 minutes the last time I smoked and I am feeling great and proud about it. :-)
    And the best part is I have one old packet lying around with two or three cigarettes left but never felt like having it till now. God give me strength and all power to fight.
  • sks, Sydney August 02, 2021 | 23:19
    Crossed my 24 hours without having a single cigarette. Yay!!
  • Percy Verence August 03, 2021 | 23:04
    @SKS: That's wonderful news!!!!!! So pleased for you!

    Keep us posted - we can do this!
  • sks, Sydney August 03, 2021 | 23:11
    It’s 2days 13hours 2 minutes already with full of fresh air.
    I took a rebirth and excited to see new me with unlocking full potential of my mind and body. Thanks to almighty for sending his angels for my rescue.
  • Percy Verence August 03, 2021 | 23:25
    Well done, SKS!

    Stay strong and keep going!

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