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So it's been 38 days. And im still taking champix but 1 tablet a day as 2 was making me feel worse. And so far so good the weird dreams have gone, i still get occasional headaches, but what i do notice is the fact im not as stressed and depressed as when i did smoke. i did go through a week of feeling like i lost a friend but that's all due to quitting and i found out its normal. After reading other stories i also am learning to tell myself you don't need that, It makes you feel sick and it makes you more stressed and also the fact it wasn't a good friend, that friend made you worse off (its how i look at it) and cost you more money, made your health worse and made you 100 times more stressed and depressed and anxious, how you wouldn't have enough money to even eat as you just spent money on that friend constantly. I look at it like that in a way because it helps me a bit and it makes me realise im dealing with everyday stress as it is now and i haven't went for a ciggarette and i still get through it but with just a more positive mindset, Yes the champix helps but to a degree it helps with stopping cravings but i am still doing all the work im choosing not to, I notice things taste better, i can breathe a bit better, i have a bit more positive mindset with things, i do notice the little things which is great and i love it!
I have been starting to do breathing exercises as well and i want to try and do a bit of yoga again i did do it but never really dived right in to much so i want to start doing that as it will relax me, as i suffer social anxiety is can be very very hard sometimes dealing with everyday life such as my dad is going through cancer and he currently has shots (zoladex) every 3 months to stop the cancer in its course not cure it obviously and thats extremely hard sometimes but also he is frustrating because he is one of them people that won't tell me or my mum what is going on so that can get a bit frustrating and depressing at times but still i've been trying to be as positive as possible! also as i haven't worked for around 4 or so years now finding work has also been a tough one so i've been relying on jobseeker payments to get by and i also live at home with my mum and dad as i don't have anywhere else to go right now and also i want to be around my family as well (i also pay rent to my mum of course) and alot in my past as well as abusive physically and mentally bad relationships which hasn't helped my anxiety either (which im currently doing counselling for all of my issues) if anything it made it worse so im just dealing with all of this stuff the best way i know how and i think i thought smoking helped with that but it really doesn't. (just thought i would share a bit about my challenges im currently facing) thankyou all so much for your stories and support it has been amazing to read and it really helps to reach out and talk! So im going to keep pushing and NOT ONE PUFF! you all can do it i know you can :) xx
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