My Everyday-Every Hour- Every minute- Battle

I have quick smoking so many times I have lost count, usually it was a day or a week maybe even two, I always came right back to them as they were my crutch.

bad day?...smoke, someone upset me?..smoke, life just not going to way I want it?...smoke. Pick your reasons, it doesn't matter, everyone has a reason to smoke. I could easily throw a ton of reasons why I was a bad addict and could not quit.

Now lets talk about how I got to this point, everyday I woke up with congestion, crud on my lips and pillow,Bad taste, chest pains through the day, don't forget to throw in a little wheezing now and again, I smell terrible, my son smells terrible from my habit!

just about all my clothes have some form of burn markings, multiple burns/mini scars on the hand from fire on your cig when flipping ash out the windows, My cars smells, the list just goes on.

Riding a bike..

I figure the best way to explain how I got here is to say quitting smoking is like learning to ride a bike. Just keep trying..one day you will have it in your mind to try to quit and something will click and all of a sudden you will have it.

On Nov 1 2017 I made a decision, I was going to be a non smoker! i made it a week, had a bad night and like always a quick trip to the store on the 7th and my night was instantly better. I smoked that whole pack that night and come the morning of the 8th I knew smoking was not the answer to my stress and problems, it was only a temp fix. Back on the wagon I went.

So I put on a nicotene patch and decided I was not going to ever smoke again, even on bad days (you see that is the hardest pill to swallow- the one where you come to terms with you will never smoke another cig), The further I got into my quit the harder it became. Finally I reached a point that I dont crave them as bad, I do not want to go through the withdraw symptoms again, I don't want to smell bad, I want to feel better and I want to live longer.

Now don't get me wrong, I have gained 30 lbs, I have had very severe constipation, I have a ringing in my ears that drives me crazy. Even with all these shortfalls. I will finish what I started, I came in this world a non smoker and will leave one too! I hope that one day my body will even out as I have smoked for the last 36 years.

I know even now my road may become rough but I am stubborn and refuse to give in I will make it, go dust off the bike and join me!

Andy