2 weeks and loosing the plot
Well yesterday was the 2 week mark for me.
This second week has definately seen many more challenges on the horizon. I have been unbelievably tired (due to insomnia), completely drained of energy, slightly irritatable and to top it all off the dreams have started.. It seems that almost every night i am dreaming that i am "sneaking cigarettes" behind everyones back and to make myself sound even crazier i get confused if i have really done it or if it has just been a dream!
Im finding it hard to remember all the positive stuff and am also feeling very unsupported by the people closest to me. Its like the novelty of me quitting and them being proud of me has worn off..
Not all days have been bad, but to be completely honest i have really missed smoking this week.
There is no way that i am going to give up, even though i feel like absolute rubbish. I have come this far and there is no way that i ever want to have to go through this again, so i am staying strong. Sometimes its this fear alone that keeps me going..
Sorry to all for the slightly morbid post, but i still will not amdit deafeat. Ciggies can take my energy and my sanity but it wont take my life!!
Hi there Bubblytoes53,
This road isnt easy, It's such a mind game, plays with your head.SO your definately not alone. I went through a crazy few days where I just wasnt connecting to anyone and I Thought every-one were just soo negative, Im not sure whether it was just me, but anyway it wasn't a nice time.I just think well you know what.IM GOING to do this, and show you all how strong I am, Im going to be heathier and change my life. Where no-one's giving you support, maybe their jealous because your focused on your gaol and your becoming who it is you want to be, You have a plan in place and its working. I look at people like that, and think hey your fat your still stuffing all that fat foodinto you and your negative because your too week to change your life.So hey look areound you, ARe these people the ones your really wanting accolades from? Probably Not cos they're not the pinnacle of health your looking for..
So good buddy, head up, keep going and You know we on this site are behind you. You will succeed and You will thank yourself for this and be happy with who you are.
So bubblytoes53, keep bubbly xoxoxox
Hi Bubbleytoes. On the weekend I was feeling a bit velnerable, so I called the quitline for the first time to ask them to send me a quit pack. Had a really good chat with the guy there and I'm thinking this could be good for you Bubbley, as it's another source of support.
Hi All, Thanks so much for your encouraging words!!
Today i am still reading the screen through blurry eyes due to insomnia, but pleased to report not feeling so morbid today :-)
Nothing is going to stop me (god help the rest of the world :-P)
Cheers