The Struggle

I want to quit but at the same time I dont. I know this sounds stupid but I find cigarettes almost like a best friend. When I'm upset, angry, excited, an emotional wreck, I have my smoke. The calming, relaxed feeling I get, can't be passed by another.

I look at my babies (human) and I hate that I can't quit for them. I want to quit for them, to be with them, run, dance and sing with them without loosing my breath. But I think in some twisted way I truly believe that smokes keep me sane and calmer for them as well as myself.

I need help..

I need support..

I need understanding..

This is why I'm on this site.

Help guys.