I dont want to leave my kids with out a mum

I always get drawn to stories about kids who loose their parent to illness when they are very young and it makes me cry every time. If fate ever brings that day to my kids, than so be it. But no more excuses;

- We are all going to die anyway

- Die young and leave a beautiful corpse

- You can geet hit by a car crossing the road

These things are out of my control. But I can not use this as a reason. No one to blame but myself if I leave my family and friends because i gave myself cancer from smoking.