Again
I know there are others on here and out there who have quit once and that was it, and I am genuinely happy for them. But I also think they should be compassionate towards those that fail. Or not I guess, I don't really need their support, I am on here mostly for somewhere to read of experiences of others and write a sort of journal for myself (which I realise I could do somewhere else, but this seems appropriate).
Anyway, after quitting my addict convinced me I needed just one more smoke, so not having anyone to "bum" one from, I bought a packet on 14 May. I didn't enjoy the first one, nor the second or any of the 20 from the packet and have quit again.... one good outcome from all of that. And I hope I have enough now to quiet the addict - I don't know if anyone else has the same sort of thing but I have quite a separate sort of voice in my head but now I can tell it that we tried it his way 20 times!!! (seems like a male to me even though I am not!) and it didn't work so too bad, we are not trying it again EVER and there is no reasonable answer to that (he seemed to sort of have half reasonable answers before I bought the last packet).
Very possibly the above will not make sense to other people and you might be thinking I need psychiatric help, please know that I am actually sane AND smoke free.
You are fabulous. Love your post and if you need psychiatric help, then I need it too lol.
My quit day (again) is Wednesday 23 May. I have lost count of the amount of times I have tried to quit. Probably only seriously though about 5 times. I have found previously that giving that other voice a name has been helpful. I will continue to do this again this time. My other voice is Tim (an ex lol) whom I will be quite happy to tell to $#&k off when he tries to get me to have just one smoke.
Congrats on being smoke free. I look forward to reading your next post.
I hadn't thought about HIM (the addict) as being separate to me before this last time. I know rationally he is part of me, but at least for the moment he is not in control like he has been previously, devious little thing that he can be!
There should be a support group called Smokers Anonymous....
Ooh, that's what I'll call him, Smoker.
So, he is quite subdued at the moment. I have no doubt that he might try again. He was a bit restless last night, but I pointed out that we had tried it his way the weekend before and got nowhere fast. (And this is where the need for psychiatric help might come in!) He started to suggest that just one would do, but I won - particularly since you can't buy just one and we don't know anyone that can give us just one. And we all know that one leads to two and so on anyway.
All the best on Wednesday, remember that if Tim is anything like Smoker he isn't rational but you ARE stronger than him.