Struggling
9 weeks today and I should be really proud of myself, but I'm fighting not to go and buy a pack.
What happened? I was so positive and happy, but I've had a pretty difficult 2 or 3 weeks. Been on Champax now for around 11 weeks and I've turned from a happy upbeat person to a blubbering mess. I've never been so emotional or depressed. Struggle to get out of bed, go to work, or do anything at all. A week ago I halved the champax and I'm starting to feel slightly better. Went to DR yesterday who said to get off the champax or I could end up in hospital. So now I'm thinking that I just want a smoke.
On a positive note, on Saturday I felt so much like a smoke that I drove to the shops to buy a pack. Ended up buying 2 blocks of triple brie cheese and biscuits instead. I was proud of myself in one sense but given I've already put on 4kg in 11 weeks, I was also pretty disgusted.
I know, I should stop beating myself up. I can deal with the weight gain later. How is having a smoke going to help me, it will only make me feel worse. Try a little harder for a little longer, bla bla bla...
Great - at work and I'm a little teary again. Feeling very nuts at the moment. Thought writing on here would make me feel better, but it's only made me feel worse.
Keep going AllyV. You are so right. Having a smoke will only start the whole process over again. I know. This is my 4th time on champix in 5 years. Each time I've failed is because I thought I'd just buy one pack and have a couple a day. It doesn't work! Keep focusing on how far you've come so far. I hope you feel better soon. 😊
Hi Ally,
I'm almost 11 weeks now and it was around the 9 week mark that I to had very strong cravings and thoughts ran through my head about 'just one'...
I would like to tell you something you've heard MANY times already on your journey and that is - that it will pass and things will get better - because Ally, at this stage of your quit you know very well that it will. Hang in there.
I've put weight on too - in fact I've gone up a whole jeans size. This is depressing in itself!!! But this is also something I will tackle later in my quit journey. I don't like it at all - what woman would - but I accept it. I accept it as part of my quit journey and I'm still doing whatever it takes to keep me quit - and if that means eating brie and biscuits - then Ally so be it - bring on the cheese :o)
I would recommend taking your doctors advice and getting off the Champix. Try another form of NRT like patches which doesn't mess with your head as much - talk to your doctor about alternatives - you never know - it could give you the new perspective you need... Im on the patches at the moment (having tried Champix my last quit attempt) and these are much better for me and so far - so good.
Good luck and please let me know how you're doing...
Oh Ally, you can do this and deep down you will know it. I remember in one of my quits years ago that I cried day after day to the point where I thought I really was going crazy. It turned out I needed some anti depressants for a while, not nicotine. If it's the Champux then get off it.
I feel I've learnt a lot about nicotine and also myself. I am not going to die if I quit smoking but I could if I continue. Im not sure if it happens to you but my mind would so blow the need for a smoke out of proportion. Seriously, it would be like 'You need a smoke, it will fix everything. Your life sucks now because you need a smoke. Your going to go insane if you don't smoke, just one will be ok' and so on over and over. It would wind me up so tight I just wanted to scream and hit something.
It's really just a craving, just the drug screaming at you, enticing, begging you to give in. Screw it- Remain strong, get your donkey on and tell it to take a hike..
It does get easier to the point where you just don't think of it as often. Thinking of you..
The first time I tried to quit smoking I was on Champix. After about a month I thought I was going to lose my mind. My dreams were horrible and bloody. My mind convinced me the only way to find happiness was to kill myself. Luckily, I had enough sense left at the time to know.... it's probably the medicine. Once I stopped taking it, those feelings went away, thank goodness.
Ask your physician if he/she can change you to Wellbutrin. It works sooooo much better for me.... and I'm at week 7 with no problems!