43 days

Hey,just wanted to say hi and hope that everyone is doing well.even though my post says 43 days,i did have a slip around day 16, actually can't remember ,and don't really want to focus on it. the fact is my slip kind of helped to be honest. It made me realise that i can't keep going around in this circle. It's like the definition of madness. To keep repeating the same behaviour and expecting a different result. Something changed after that slip. I'm also training for 10 k runI'd only ever done 5ks but halfway through my training i realised i can't do both, so i made a deal with myself,Id give up the fags until the race and then if i still felt like smoking afterwards i have one!! Mad i know, but its working,the race is in 3 weeks and i can now run up to 45 mins,this is not boasting its just i CANT believe the difference not smoking is making. Believe me when i say I loved and totally depended on my cigarettes, i had a really horribly traumatic time 2 years ago and actually was so low i didn't want to be around anymore,my kids kept me going) It feels so good to be looking after myself once again. Giving up is the hardest thing i have done ,and i really dont say that lightly. Anyhoooo,there is light at the end and i'm not naive,i know the urge is always there,it's still early days. But this site and the support have been invaluable, S