Ups and Downs
Today is my 22nd day without a cigarette and I am feeling slightly chuffed that I am entering Week 4 of the ordeal/journey/new life. I remember being buoyed by a sense of enthusiasm in the first few days and thought that those were going to be the very worst. Huh! I had a shocker only three days ago and really did think that I would go crazy and that my life was over. But I went to bed and have felt so much better these last three days. These ups and downs are so unpredictable but if we know that the tide turns when we are having a bad day, then we can approach it more rationally.
I have also felt a curious mixture of joy and sadness. I feel joy that I have found freedom from that horrible addiction and am no longer in prison. But I also feel sad about the loss of a companion. I was booking something for a holiday in December and I thought 'Oh no ... that's not going to be any fun ... I won't have my ciggies with me'. Then I thought of all the people who have tackled this addiction and have come out the other side - and how much I want to be one of them.
There is certainly not a lot of smooth sailing at the moment ...
Remember that all ups and downs are not smoking related, and may just be part of normal life, and learning to cope with them without smokes may be harder, and more challenging, but realistically, the smoking never fixed any of those problems before...
Head up, be proud of your 22 days, and try delay any descisions on a down day, and wait for things to turn...
"This too Shall pass.." Persian proverb 1200AD..
Hi Fullofhope, sounds like you have been on the roller coaster and holding on tightly waiting for the roller coaster to return to the horizontal platform where you alight . What can I say welcome to the wonderful ride of quitting.when I wrote my post about the star chart a few of the days up to 21 were very hard. I have to hand it to you your determination on this ride has been unbelievable.some days I hoped the fairies would drop in and wave their magic wand and I would feel normal, like the non smokers do.then I realised life is up and down and I have to adjust to the fact that I have to cope without darts. You should be feeling very chuffed you have done very good . Put loads of stars on your chart.xxxxxxx............ still waiting on those fairies to pop in
Thanks Nanette - I will try and entice the fairies. I was saying to a friend today that I think there is also a little gremlin who circles around the world and pounces on a few special people and waves his wand and BANG! We are addicts. So it will be a fight between the fairies and that gremlin.
You are always so positive and I really appreciate the support you give to me and to everyone on this site.
Always great to read your posts,it is really hard but the support here is priceless.Keep going x