day 10 feels like 10 weeks

Well, I am on the patches,still having vivid teams, which would be OK but usually about work, still looking for my partner(cigie) when I have a coffee but I still go outside in the morning,talk to the dog about what I miss about smoking. I have cut to 1 morning coffee a day the rest I drink Green tea and getting to like it. My husband quit 6 mnths ago and I think I am the "last women standing " in the smoking circle.

I guess I have been OK, I had 1 really bad day last week and supposed to go and get my groceries but didn't think going near a shop that sold ciggies would be too much to bare. I greeted hubbie with a growl when he got home, told him that he would have to sort dinner ,he happily obliged with McDonalds. Oh well, at least we had a good laugh.

I have realised how much smoking has ruled my life, how much time out of the day it consumed. No more trying to find that coffee shop where u can smoke outside, no more standing outside when you go out for dinner or to friends and I no longer smell like an ash tray like many people who you pass when out " OMG did I really smell like that" Yep getting my smell back and my taste. I have opened all the windows today at the back of the house onto our decking (smoking area) I no longer have to worry about the smell permitting the house now and yes even though we always smoked outdoors with the doors shut the smell came in.

I know that I still have a long way to go, it's only early days, but my determination is much stronger now. I deserve this for myself. so for anyone who are quitting, throw the smokes the lighters and ashtrays out tell a trusted friend that u r quitting and if they will be there for you, share your story here,don't worry if you might be angry or frustrated who knows we may be able to have a laugh together.