Very disappointed!
I just don't know what happened! I'm 68 days in on my quit journey and tonight I'm just sitting here relaxing watching a movie on tv and all of a sudden I can't explain my feelings....
I was feeling really blue and wanted a cigarette, meh I really feel disappointed and hating myself right about now! I had a cigarette, it tasted realy good, but I'm really regretting it!!
So what I did was, had a shower to wash the stink off and brushed my teeth so vigorously. And now I sit here writing this post really hating myself that I did it.
Sigh, some nice words would help right about now. I feel like a failure - like I gave into my weakness :(
It absolutely feels like I have no willpower at all and that the slightest thing can trigger me into going back into that nasty habit. I know I can pick myself back up from this slip up, but some days it just feels like I can't do it and that my mind keeps saying "why bother giving up? You're just going to go back to smoking again!"
I so want to prove myself wrong and feel like I CAN accomplish something... I don't want to be a failure anymore! :(
dont have another because of guilt. You havent failed it was a slip up,dont think of it as starting again because you are too far in for that. Keep going the mind played a trick on you be aware of it from now on.
Hey AnythingsPossible - come on you have been one of my partners in this journey. I'm on 52 days today and I agree with everything you have said. I can totally understand the slip as well. But agree don't beat yourself up about it and you are NOT a failure!! Just think of how many cigarettes you HAVEN'T smoked in the last 68 days. I am just over 2,000. Then you will realise what you haev already achieved. Every day is a new day. Don't do it again.
Thanks guys! Only had that one slip up that day, I'm back on track now! Feeling better :)
And a special thanks to you leighdo13, you're right we have been partners through this journey. you always know what to say - you must have some wisdom behind you! :P xx