Quit when I was ready

I had tried to quit previously but I quickly realised that I would never quit until I really wanted to quit. I would smoke winfied reds - about a pack every 2 days. Weekends I could smoke 2 packs a day depending on what was going on.

There were times when my father tried to make deals with me to quit together. We smoked our last cigarette together. It didn't work, I would light up the next day and hide it for as long as I could.

My then girlfriend-now fiance-soon wife often pleaded with me to quit. I tried a few times, lasted a few days, weeks. She made me reward baskets with chocolates. Once again, that never stuck.

It wasn't until Feb 18 2008 when I was walking from the train station to work (about a 2 minute walk) that I realised I had to quit. As per usual I walked to work from the station with a cigarette in my mouth (at that time of morning [9am] it would be my 3rd or fourth of the day). 

I arrived at work and I was panting and sweating. It was a fairly warm day but nothing that warranted sweating. It was at that moment I decided that I must quit. I didn't want to be out of breath any more, wake up and hock up phlem constantly, have that crap taste in my mouth, smell like smoke, sweat like a pig.

So I did what I had to do. I scrunched up the packet and threw it in the bin. Had to be done then and there. There is no such thing as tomorrow when quitting, or the end of the packet, or a farewell quit. If you are going to quit, you must do it now.

So off I went to the chemist and bought some patches. I threw one on immediately. and spent a long & hard day at work. I had my nicotine fix. But the smoking sensation and the habit was hard to break. But I kept with it and got through the day without buying another pack.

The next few days were the hardest. You really want to smoke. You love smoking. It feels so good. But you know you can't. I didn't, I was doing well.

After a week I decided to to create my own rules when it came to the patches. The instructions on the box told me to put it on as soon as I get up in the morning and before bed. I did that originally but now was the time to take action. I started carrying my patches to work, when I felt the urge and put it on 10am, 11am, 12pm, 1pm etc and then I would take it off earlier at night 10pm, 9pm, 8pm, 7pm etc. So I was gradually reducing the hours in the day I had the patch on, limiting my nicotine intake and my need for it.

After 3 weeks it got to the stage where I would carry the patch around in my pocket but never put it on. I haven't worn it since.

I would have to say that the first 3 months was the hardest. It got dramatically easier after that. There has been times when I have been offered cigarettes and some have tried to force them on me even after telling them i've quit. I stood strong and flat out refused.

One smoke leads to two and two leads to more. It isn't something I have to keep telling myself as I do not get any cravings anymore. But I do tell that to people who offer me a smoke or who have just quit.