Stories & experiences

Freakboy
10
Stories
15/01/2012
Joined

Overcoming doubt

Posted in Quit experiences 06 Feb 2012
3 Comments

Okay day 34 and over $510 saved. I am a 40 year old male who has been a smoker for about 26 years. I am a shift worker and usually smoke about one pack of Winnie blues a day however on night shift in a 10 hour period used to smoke a whole pack easily if work was light on. I haven't written anything yet as I have have doubted that I would get this far. I am scared that I will just have one puff which will lead to one cigarette which will lead to one pack a day. And bam before you know it I'm back to square one. Sadly this is my first serious attempt at quitting I have chosen to attempt cold turkey as I work in the nightclub industry enough people smoke round me so I figured the second hand nicotine is still getting in my system. This journey has been so hard but the fear of failing is keeping me strong. My appetite has remained the same and I am still drinking alcohol even been intoxicated a few times since my quit date and stayed strong. The benefits after a month are starting to become obvious my exercise routine is easier, my taste buds seem sharper and unfortunately given the industry I work in my sense of smell is amazing sometimes I wish it wasn't so sharp. My skin seems clearer as well I have deliberately kept to my old routine when I'm on the phone I stand outside and talk minus the smoke I have a coffee as soon as I wake up and again go outside to have it. I am determined to live my life as I used to minus the cigs. I accept I am scared of failure and won't give up being scared and doubting myself as this is keeping me strong. Disgustingly the only cravings I experienced we're after a heavy training session where I used to have a smoke before hitting the showers. Okay so this is my weird little experience. I still think of myself as a smoker attempting to quit. I am way to afraid to say I have quit them for good yet as I think having a healthy respectful fear of addiction is not a bad thing. I intend to write another rambling session at day 60 or there abouts. I guess like a lot of people I have been sitting on the sidelines reading everyone's else's posts. Cheers.

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3 Comments

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  • Bubbleytoes53, Illawarra Shoalhaven February 06, 2012 | 15:19
    Hi Freakboy,

    Firstly congrats on your amazing work so far!! Cold turkey is certainly not for the faint of heart, but you are charging on.. You should give yourself a huge pat on the back :-)

    I totally hear what you are saying about the fear keeping you going. There have been many a dark moments in my quit experience (currently at day 22) when the only thing keeping me from having a ciggie is the fear of having to start the quit process all over again.. The fear of having to experience that living nightmare is enough to keep me away from the ciggies..

    When times get tough, keep yourself busy, remember the reasons why you wanted to quit in the first place, the money you are saving and the new health benefits..

    When it comes down to it, if we really really want something, we will do it..

    Stay strong and keep soldiering on - you have come so far!!
  • freedom February 06, 2012 | 16:10
    Hey Freakboy, well done 34 days is great you are a lot stronger than me there was no way i could of done it cold turkey.We all go through the fear of wanting a smoke and we do think to ourselves "just one more smoke " and we all know like u said 1 leads to 2 then yeh b4 u know it u own a pkt of smokes.I still have the craving for one every now and then.You are doing really well keep up the good work
  • MickeyJ, Southern NSW February 06, 2012 | 20:24
    Welcome to the Cold Turkey Club Freakboy! Not even cranberry sauce allowed!

    Well done man - you've got this thing nailed!

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