Stories & experiences

converse
35
Stories
10/05/2013
Joined

8 months....

Posted in Quit experiences 20 Jan 2014
6 Comments

Hi everyone, 

I hope everyone is doing well quitting. I have come quiet abit along the road now..... 8 months on. Glad I quit and wish that it happened sooner. Better still I wish I never started!!!! 

It is a tough tough road, but I keep treading on it. I not going to lie I do think of 'the one'  but have not caved yet..... I believe I won't, I am so stubborn, do not know if that is a good thing or a bad. I am kinda hard on myself . I still take it one day at a time. I will never forget that this had control over me for many many years. I never allow myself to get cocky. I am cautious , but I do celebrate in ways also. It has been a mad year for me , I learned so so much , realised I as a person need to put myself first and put much more value on me instead of others. It is exshausting , and you never get the same respect in return. I am hurt , I am sad , I feel many many things.... but I have learned , that is what I take from it all. I have found times where I truely believed that a smoke will help calm me down, make me into a more chilled out person to please others. But I then I remember , I am not that 16 year old anymore. I do not need to smoke to fit in, to help me feel part of something, or to belong. To deal with bullying, to cope. I do not need to stuff it all down puff after puff. I am stronger than I have been given credit for, I am healing in my own way.

I went for a long run the other day, it was on old moutain road where I live I climbed and climbed as high as I could go, my legs were killing me when I reached the top. I never looked back the whole way up, I waited until the climb was over. I took a deep breath and turned around to see the most wonderful view. I couldn't reach that if I smoked, I would have missed the beauty. I stayed a while and took it all in, deep breathing, nature can make you see further beyond your own limitations. I discovered that nice place and it was comforting. I will keep on climbing , I hope I make the year!!!! 

Thank you to all the huge support here.... keep going to everyone, never give up on quitting...most importantly never give on believing that you can beat this addiction... it does not matter how many times you try all that matters is that you do. 

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6 Comments

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  • Nic succeed January 20, 2014 | 19:20
    A big congratulations to you Converse. You have been here with me for a long time and I find you truly inspiring. THANKYOU, keep on climbing and I am there behind you using your strength!!
  • A.F.U, Hunter New England January 20, 2014 | 20:31
    Congratulations on your 8 month achievement well done converse and thanks for all the support and posts.
    All the best
  • doigiva January 20, 2014 | 23:23
    Hi converse,
    You are a legend & I love you thinking, keep up the good work !
  • Dottily January 22, 2014 | 19:58
    Hey Converse, you will make the year, and all the ones after. Such a hard journey, and like you I still have that sneaky thought of just one. Even today I just thought I'll be alone for a few days, no one would know, just one... But why? Nothing to gain, everything to lose. I'm stubborn too, not going to let the addiction win, can't change the past, but we'll be in control of our futures. Go girl, stay strong!
  • converse January 25, 2014 | 0:16
    Hi thanks everyone for your support. I am finding it tough now without the smokes. This week has been particularly stressful, have been dying to light up. But I know that I would regret it tremendously. So keep on going with it.
  • Nic succeed January 25, 2014 | 11:39
    Hi converse, just wanted to send a message to thank you for both your inspiring story and support. As you know my journey has been extremely up and down, and I worked out that I have actually been trying for over a year. I remember those first few weeks for you were tough and you had little support from family and friends. Well you did it and have shown yourself, others and myself that it can be done, the nicotine can be beaten.

    I have been getting really emotional and upset with myself for not carrying on with my many quit attempts, but thanks to your most recent post I have realised that as long as I keep trying I am succeeding (although very slowly). Back on day 3 and have reevaluated my situation and using new tools and strategies to succeed. I know this time will be different as I am feeling very emotional, I have to believe that this is it, this is my final journey as a non-smoker (although it is hard to think this since I have returned to smoking so many times).

    Anyway just wanted to message you as I feel you truly understand me and let you know that it really means a lot to have you on my side. X

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