Stories & experiences

humble
34
Stories
16/05/2013
Joined

Hissy fit

Posted in Getting started 03 Jan 2014
6 Comments

Hi everyone, my quit date is coming up soon. Today I cut down to two smokes then because I had none I threw the biggest tantrum until my husband got me more. I've just had two now an have calmed down. I can't believe how childlike I was, crying, yelling, threatening to leave, [I wouldn't I love my husband dearly). I just shows how cigarettes can take over, I went on like this for an hour until I got them. I have apologised, he's not too impressed not that I can blame him. This has made me want to give up even more as I think how stupid, all over cigarettes.

Report abuse

6 Comments

Showing oldest to newest. Swap comments order
  • converse January 04, 2014 | 0:41
    Hi Humble,

    It sounds like you are giving the smokes too much power. That is very common at the beginning when you know you are about to face the unknown, it can be scary.
    I had once shared many years with a person very close to me who used to do the very same , over a Cannibis. What had to change was his belief systems about who he was. He needed to trust himself that he can cope, survive and just breathe on his own. That he was lovable and of huge value, that was his own to acknowledge, and to internalize. Addiction can be as powerful as we allow it to be. So many people have walked the path , it is so possible. I went through times while quitting where it was hard to keep control, had alot of negativity from smokers around me, just selfishness and in truth, they were showing me their fear.....
    Fundamentally the fear for some is about being vulnerable,embracing the soul crying,the dark, the human, the reality....and whatever that may be for each of us. I understand that for some it not that deep, but for some it can be, it was for me. Know that you can turn to this site, you are here for you, this is your journey.Focus entirely on you, tune in 100%, write thoughts down, channel it outwards. One day at a time. Believe in yourself, your approval and nobody else will keep you on track on the quit journey. Good luck and keep posting, take it slow, and do use an aid if you need, cold turkey is hard. Each to their own. Well done on deciding to do something healthy and positive for you!!! keep doing that, exercise , diet.
  • Nic succeed January 04, 2014 | 12:04
    Hi humble. It can be difficult to think of ourselves as non smokers. You can do it, there will be ups and downs along the way, stay positive and know that there are many people here with you for support and strength. Good luck, we CAN beat this! Xx
  • Amberd January 04, 2014 | 18:04
    Last time I tried to quit I became a monster and I hated myself for it....My new quit day is tomorrow and now at least I know some of the triggers that will set me off.....I am hoping this time will be the last! Good luck to you.
  • humble January 04, 2014 | 20:44
    Ty converse, a lot of that made me think what you wrote in a positive way, I will look back on it when I need to. I've been through a bit of therapy for fear only not related to smoking but I will use the positive coping skills I learnt to help me thru. Thanks nic and Amberd I know we can do it just got to think positive positive positive, good luck amberd on your first day.
  • Gammy, Hunter New England January 06, 2014 | 6:45
    Ohhh Humble,
    The nicotine addiction is pretty powerful at times. I can relate to your post though I was soo like that before I gave up the fags, But honestly believe in yourself, and believe you have the strength and power to beat this addiction. Honestly look at what your giving power to, A rolled up piece of grass ( tobacco ), really break it down and look at it for all it is. It's just a ciggie that has got control of you. Try and be strong and you will overcome this addiction.
    Good luck and wishing you all the best.
    You are not alone, we were all completely addicted and controlled by smoking and we are all here together to keep strong and win this battle...
  • humble January 06, 2014 | 20:23
    Ty Gammy you are so right had to laugh though at a rolled up piece of grass, I will win this time.

You need to register or log in to leave a comment.