Stories & experiences


One Moment At A Time

Posted in Getting started 26 Apr 2021

My husband and I have set our quit date of May 1st. Here we go again. We had both quit for 3 yrs due to serious heart issues with my husband and neither of us had a difficult time quitting that time. Then 2 yrs ago my husband was diagnosed with prostrate cancer and off to the races and we became smokers AGAIN. We have tried several times in the last few years to quit. Well, to be honest, didn’t try very hard. When one of us got the urge, we just started up again. This time around, I truly want to quit. I am always feeling tired and no energy and since this whole COVID situation, just have been smoking more. Tired of making excuses. I have read on here about fear and it has really hit home with me. Fear of what am I going to do in the morning when I wake up, fear of driving in the car without a smoke, fear of what am I going to do when I get home, the list goes on and on. I have been doing some soul searching on this. Trying to get into the right mindset so I don’t fail once again. When I get honest with myself, I am afraid I am going to fail again so why bother trying. That is why I am trying to get in a different mindset and I am not a failure. I am not going to put expectations on myself. I am going to take it one moment at a time. We are going on a 2 wk vacation the middle of June and I DO NOT WANT TO BE SMOKING. I am going to read blogs on a daily basis to help me get thru each day. I love reading what everybody writes and thank you all. Cathy

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  • softly40, Mid North Coast April 26, 2021 | 8:22
    Welcome Cathy, you can and will be able to stop smoking for good. It is a great idea to read and learn as much as you can. For me this was not my 1st or 2nd attempt over a significant span of time. I learnt something about myself each time though, it will be great if you can start looking at yourself as you say, before you make this your last attempt.

    Why would you want to smoke when delivered bad news of any kind, this does not help the situation one bit, it just disguises the real issue you need to face, the cigarette is a sly beast with loads of nicotine to keep you coming back for more, when you think it helps you it is doing the opposite.

    So lets be free to begin with; more research and more reading, and more posting, and more enjoyment of new things you might not have discovered, keep your mind open, and practice NOPE (not one puff ever) every day.

    Have a look at the video "How to grow to be a happy non-smoker" presented by NASIA DAVOS its on utube.....TEDxUniversityofPiraeus. You will learn a lot about the drug and understand yourself before you start this time. Show you husband and get him to join us too, or at least have some input.
  • Red-67 April 26, 2021 | 9:13
    Open your mind to what you are saying..
    "diagnosed with cancer" ! So you go back to smoking ? ?
  • Red-67 April 26, 2021 | 9:21
    Oops, wrong key :)
    I know, I WAS a stupid smoker for 45+ years, because I THOUGHT I smoked because I enjoyed it. I WANTED to smoke.. Until I opened my eyes to the truth.
    That's how it works. An otherwise intelligent person, will waste money, time, and risk their health, to satisfy an addiction to SMOKING !
    Embrace the idea of breaking free. Make a smoke something you simply do NOT WANT..
    The only thing to FEAR, is continuing to smoke..
  • Robn April 26, 2021 | 9:37
    Hi Cathy, well done on your decision to quit. Before your quit date arrives try changing some habits in preparation. Stop smoking in the car.....go for short trips in the car and don’t smoke. When you get home and you want to have a smoke, dont sit down and settle in, stand up outside, have that smoke and go inside. A few little changes to your normal routines can help to break the old habits. Delay...if you have a smoke as soon as you get up...have a shower first. I did these things leading up to my quit and it did help as by the time I quit I was used to a slightly different routine. I too smoked for over 40 years and a lot of my life was ruled by ingrained habits. Make your mind up 100% that you do not want to smoke, keep telling yourself how disgusting it is, the smell, the expense and all the disgusting health issues....these are the reasons you are quitting.
    Make up your mind and do it, one day at a are stronger than this addiction
  • CathyBrinkman April 26, 2021 | 9:48
    Thank you all for the encouraging comments and great suggestions. I appreciate it.
  • Happiness April 26, 2021 | 10:46
    It is nice to have your husband on board with your quit, but it is not a contest. It is not who can abstain for the longest. Quitting smoking has prerequisites......first it is You who WANTS to quit. Learn about why you now find it important to quit and to find the BELIEF in yourself that you can.
    It is good that you face the "fear" but face it, they are really all excuses.
    I left housework undone and closets to clean as a time filler if required.
    Smoking is boring. Is your life that dull?
    Are you proud that your smoke?
    Are you aware of what you really smell like?
    I have many posts that you can learn from if you click on my name above. Find the free e-book for Allen Carr's wonderful help and discover the truth and develop the mindset. I also have a piece of things that you can do prior to smoking. Cutting down does not help. You will cherish every moment spend and begrudge the upcoming quit. Instead take the time to actually taste it, see how it causes its own cravings, and does nothing for stress, confidence. See how demanding smoking is. You are an addict and a slave to nicotine. Repeat....I am an addict and a slave to nicotine. How do you feel about that?

    Had you learned the mindset years ago,, you would not have picked up the killing poison stick again. Losing limbs and life are ignored because of fear. We don't fear when we have confidence. We don't say I'll try, we say let's do it!
  • Icanquit71, South Eastern Sydney April 26, 2021 | 22:05
    Look up pictures of smoking damage to humans

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