Stories & experiences

Ladysmith
South Eastern Sydney
1
Story
7/12/2019
Joined

Struggling

Posted in Getting started 24 Feb 2020
11 Comments

I need help, badly.

I was a smoker until I fell pregnant in October of 2017. I managed to stay smoke-free until a few months after my daughter was born. In the 18 months since then I’ve tried to quite a handful of times, once I managed to go for 10 whole weeks. But I always manage to convince myself to go back to it. I feel weak and guilty and ashamed.

After reading Alan Carr’s book I gave up three days ago. And today I bought a packet and smoked five after feeling like my brain was going severely deranged.

How do I overcome this? I feel so sad. Just really really sad.

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11 Comments

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  • softly40, Mid North Coast February 25, 2020 | 6:49
    My dear Ladysmith, such a wonderful mother who thought of her unborn baby first and foremost. This gave you your reason then, now you really need to value yourself more and give yourself your own special Mantra your own special reason for yourself every day, (write it out, say it out, every day) Consider this as a long term approach now that your short term approach has finished. For Gods sake Get back on your horse and do it properly and stay close to this forum. NOPE (not one puff ever)
  • Happiness February 25, 2020 | 7:24
    It would take a lot of convincing to go back into the pit once tasting true freedom. b etter health.wealth and pride in yourself and especially understanding how the evil drug took root and gained control of us. You are not alone now and we are your new friends. Cigarrettes never did do anything for you..we can help . Join Us and stay close.
  • Oliver Brooks, Hunter New England February 25, 2020 | 9:22
    don't know exactly what to say however - i figure maybe you spoke to your GP an got some nicorette chewing gum - avoid alcohol for the first couple of weeks - remember your mindset needs to be in the groove to succeed - throw your pack of smokes in the bin - an remember how much money they cost - Yours Faithfully, Oliver Brooks :-J
  • mandella, Mid North Coast February 25, 2020 | 9:28
    There is not one person who contributes to this forum that cannot identify with parts of your journey, for myself this is my 4th attempt after 53 years of slavery to nicotine, and i believe this is the hardest thing in my life, today i'm 3 weeks free, yes i read Allan Carr's book and it is helping me on a daily basis. The only thing i can suggest is reread the book, stay close to this forum. and remember, One Day At A Time, N.O.P.E. (not one puff ever) and acknowledge what you have and not what you haven't. Cheers!
  • Robn February 25, 2020 | 20:03
    Hi Ladysmith, take some time for yourself and really think about what those five cigarettes did for you....how they tasted, how did they make you feel.
    When you say you say you convinced yourself to go back to smoking...why?...What positive did you think it would bring into your life. Re read Allen Carr’s book, you didn’t quit smoking you simply stopped for awhile...there is a huge difference. After you have reread the book and changed your mindset you will never want to smoke again...ever. Stay strong and focused
  • Robn February 25, 2020 | 20:03
    Hi Ladysmith, take some time for yourself and really think about what those five cigarettes did for you....how they tasted, how did they make you feel.
    When you say you say you convinced yourself to go back to smoking...why?...What positive did you think it would bring into your life. Re read Allen Carr’s book, you didn’t quit smoking you simply stopped for awhile...there is a huge difference. After you have reread the book and changed your mindset you will never want to smoke again...ever. Stay strong and focused
  • Happiness February 26, 2020 | 0:08
    Did you read the book? you cannot just skim it. You need to identify with the feelings and situations. Understanding nicotine and you, acknowleding the truths go a long way. You can quit smoking when you realize that it is just a mooney pit with nothing to offer except despair in the end.
  • Ladysmith, South Eastern Sydney February 26, 2020 | 9:05
    Thank you everyone for your comments. I've read the Allen Carr book twice, haven't skimmed either time, and while I find parts of it really stick with me, it's the associations that I'm having trouble breaking. With a young child I have very little time to myself - time to be alone with my thoughts or to read parts of the internet I enjoy or even do admin like replying to emails. I like that smoking gives me these completely free windows of time where someone else is looking after my daughter and I can stop and relax and not worry for a few minutes at a time. I don't know how to recreate that situation without smoking. And that's 100% why I continue to come undone.

    I appreciate all the kind words - I'll be sticking close to this forum I think.
  • Lando, Hunter New England February 26, 2020 | 10:39
    My youngest is about to turn 17. If I had put $24 a day away in a bank account for him instead of setting it on fire, I would be gifting him $148,920. Is that worth having a short walk around the back yard instead of lighting up?

    Nobody disturbs you when you brush your teeth - try doing that, and enjoying the beautiful fresh breath it gives you instead of the ashtray breath you would get from smoking.

    You are worth it.
  • Robn February 26, 2020 | 10:48
    Hi Ladysmith, life without smoking is really no different than life as a smoker. You take the time to go and have a puff so the time is there, it is just what you choose to do with it, now you have the time to reply to those emails and have a read of the internet, or simply sit outside and daydream. Make smoking something you don’t want in your life not something you can’t have. If you feel deprived you will slip up every time. If you can go one day without, you can do two days and so on. Take one day at a time.
  • Robn February 26, 2020 | 10:48
    Hi Ladysmith, life without smoking is really no different than life as a smoker. You take the time to go and have a puff so the time is there, it is just what you choose to do with it, now you have the time to reply to those emails and have a read of the internet, or simply sit outside and daydream. Make smoking something you don’t want in your life not something you can’t have. If you feel deprived you will slip up every time. If you can go one day without, you can do two days and so on. Take one day at a time.

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