Stories & experiences

Hunter New England

Day 5,Time to Reach Out

Posted in Getting started 05 Jan 2020

With support from family, I have been strong. Don't really know what I need, why I am feeling the need to post, but it seemed the right thing to do. Maybe the right words are feeling a little lost without my "freinds" of 35 years.

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  • Happiness January 06, 2020 | 1:52
    Hi Lando and welcome. I am always delighted when someone lets their presence be known. We learn through each others experiences and trials. While I try to assure people that this journey can be easy, it will not be easy for all. Someone was assured by you and your statement that all is good and that they are normal and experiencing the same as someone else.

    The site runs much like a magazine where input is needed to keep it fresh and alive. We certainly had our interesting moments last month with some visitors and some discussions on nrt's. Maybe you would like to tell us your quit smoking plan and whether you have just joined or have been following us for some time. Learning about nicotine and you is very important.

    A new member came last month and is a very happy-non smoker today. In just a short time you too may be able to flip that switch in your mind back to on and flood the light of truth into every corner of our addiction.

    Allan Carr's book the Easy Way to Stop Smoking fills in a lot of blanks that we closed our thoughts to . Why did we start smoking? What does he mean I don't enjoy it? What will I do without the cigarette?

    When we allow ourselves to stop and think about these questions , we gain the insight necessary to regain our confidence that we can beat nicotine. We realize that we have been told over and over how hard it is to quit that we stopped trying and believing. I gained that belief simply by joining a quit group. As I think most smokers are aware, you won't quit smoking until YOU want to. I have always wanted to, I just never believed i could until now.

    Our stories here are inspiring. They feed hope and desire to fuel some for this journey. The more fuel, the better the chances. So yes, we are very happy to have member step forward and join us in this endeavor.

  • Lando , Hunter New England January 06, 2020 | 8:10
    Hello Happiness. Thanks for your response.
    I have been a smoker for 35 years. I gave up briefly as a teenager following a stint in hospital, but took it back up when that summer hit, and my bikini body was a bit plumper than I liked. The silliness of youth.
    I have tried a number of times over the years. I have done patches, lozenges, cold turkey,champix, acupressure, hypnotherapy....None have worked, but I have never given up on giving up. I guess the time was never right, or the motivations not strong enough.
    I have been planning this for some time, I am giving the Champix another go. Saw the doctor in August, started the program on 22 October, halved my smoking after 2 weeks, halved again 2 weeks later. Was down to 4-5 smokes a day until Quit Day on New Years Day.
    Truth is I have not actually been enjoying smoking for some time - has been making me a bit nauseous, I am very conscious of the bad smell of me and my clothes. And although I have no adverse health effects, it is surely only a matter of time. Putting my smoking at 15 a day over 35 years means I have dodged 191,625 bullets over the years.
    I have been lurking this site for a few days, taking other peoples' experiences and comments in. I have downloaded the book, and having it printed today.
    I don't actually miss the smokes, happy to go the NOPE path, but in a weird way I miss being a smoker.
  • Happiness January 06, 2020 | 9:54
    Maybe you just miss your so called friend. Have you joined a quit group before? Having understanding , support and people who genuinely care about you and your well being are the true friends. It is also good to have family and friends behind you , especially if they have been smokers.

    So good on you for wanting to make it stick this time and making a change. I am surprised that you have not read Allen Carr's book. Maybe you just never let it known of your quit attempts and didn't get any sound advice.
    I am sure that by reading the stories you will gain confidence in your ability to quit smoking , just as I did. It is empowering to know nicotine is not as strong as we have been led to believe. Understanding nicotine and how it came to control us unawares, gives us the upper hand in taking back that control.
    You sound serious this time and I think that these changes this time around may be key. You need never feel alone or misunderstood because we know and feel for you. Open your mind to quitting, and if you can embrace this quit as the best thing you will likely ever do for yourself , you should be a happy non-smoker in no time, just like our Pisces. What a story. It still blows my mind just how powerful the mind is!

    Outside of meeting your soul mate and a union that is everything and for always, can anyone thing of something we would be more beneficial to ourselves than quitting smoking? I would really like to hear some answers. Possibly conquering other addictions......????

  • Lando , Hunter New England January 06, 2020 | 10:20
    More beneficial than quitting smoking? How about never having started?

    It's not just beneficial to myself, but for all the family. About to be a grandparent for the first time very soon. I remember when my son was just a bub and how he would recoil from the smell of me when I came too close too soon after having a smoke. There wont be any of that with my grandbaby.

    I have never joined a quit group before. I made a call to the quitline once, when I was getting ready to give up, but they told me they couldn't help me until I had stopped and I should call back then. I never stopped.

    In previous attempts, I kept it secret, so that nobody would know if I failed. I recognise that I was setting myself up for failure.

    This is not just an attempt. This is the beginning of my success story. I am loud and proud about it, and talking to my family with openness and honesty about how things are going. I am looking at any and all forms of support to stay on track.

    My mind is well open Happiness, I know this is the best thing I can do for me, and for my family. I am already a non-smoker.
  • Happiness January 06, 2020 | 12:41
    Sounds like you are on the inside track and heading for success. How astute for you to recognize the difference between an attempt and a focus with a predetermined outcome. That is the spirit and belief you need in yourself and in what you want for yourself in the future. You can do it if you really want to. Once people understand that and find the reason to WANT to quit smoking rather than making excuses they certainly do hold the power to do so.
    Congratulations on the impending grandchild and your wise decision. Yes, If we could only turn back time. We can however be good role models and be supportive to others who are like minded. All the best to you my friend. I have no doubt that you will indeed succeed.
  • Lia January 06, 2020 | 15:01
    Hi Lando. OK, so you are ditching a friend you've had for 35 years. Was it really a great friend. On this site we too thought that was our friend. Good times, bad times. Friend was always there. We know how fickle this so called friend really is. Almost like it is encouraging a death sentence. Friends on this site may be anonymous yet they really do care. A non smoker can never truly understand but this community does. Enjoy being a sweet smelling Grandma.
  • Pisces24 , Central Coast January 06, 2020 | 15:08
    Hi! Lando and welcome.
    I smoked for 47 years and like you not too many per day (5-10) but EVERY day without fail. I am just as much addicted to Nicotine as one who smokes 40 a day!
    I never believed I could ever have the strength or courage to quit.
    I am Day 33 now so one month up my sleeve...
    I started on 15mg patches. Just went and bought them after seeing an ad on TV AND
    I then joined ICANQUIT. I didnt know anything about NRTs or nicotine or anything. I was going to go to my Dr. but was too ashamed. I guess I really didnt believe I could but I was going to try.
    I was sick of sneaking and lying and hiding my addiction and felt very pathetic and hopeless.
    I was advised to read the book. I eventually did after a few weeks and WOW!
    I was looking at quitting all wrong. I was still a smoker who just wasnt smoking. I looked at Nicotine and learnt a lot about it and I havent had any cravings since.
    I will never smoke again.
    I am strong not weak.
    I blamed myself all these years. It wasnt me that was weak it wad the addictive drug that had hold of me and anyone else silly enough to try smoking.
    Once I understood the addiction I could let go and let the feelings go.
    I sometimes am reminded of smoking but they are not cravings because I dont WANT to smoke.
    Im not addicted now. Its gone from my life. Im just so very sad and sorry I didnt switch on years ago.
    I have saved $550 in 1 month! I dont feel self conscious or ashamed.
    I feel proud and happy and positive.
    You can too.
    Read that book.
    Im not going to wish you good luck. You dont need that now as you are going in the right direction with the right attitude.

  • Pisces24 , Central Coast January 06, 2020 | 15:22
    So true Lia..A non smoker can NEVER understand.. To them its so black and white.
    WHY would you spend a fortune to jeopardise your health, stink like an old drunk, and ostracize yourself from everyone, not to mention your own bad feelings??? But dont bash yourself up too much. It used to be cool as to smoke! Not now eh???
    It will be black and white to you too soon...
    You will be free of your addiction and happy to be free of smoking.
    I am now a grandmother too and my grandchildren will never smell smoke on their Nanny. Good example.
  • Lando , Hunter New England January 06, 2020 | 16:38
    Thank you all. I am on page 55 of the book. Compelling reading...can't put it down. I had to go out to a shopping centre this afternoon, and as it says in the book, took note of the smokers while I was out and about. They really don't look happy, or satisfied. So glad to not be one of them anymore.
  • Nuts January 06, 2020 | 23:22
    Hi Lando. When you quit after smoking for 35 years, it takes a while to adjust. Smoking is a habit as well as an addiction and the habit is the hardest to break. Make new habits. Have your morning cuppa in a different place. After dinner, count to 10 and then have a glass of water. The days soon turn into week and months and so on. Ha g in there. Its so worth it 😊
  • Pisces24 , Central Coast January 07, 2020 | 9:05
    Its funny Lando... step right back and observe. Ive done that at a party. You understand their agony though and happy it is not you anymore..
    Edgy, looking to escape....
    the look when they come back (after going to a carpark or Street or some isolated place)..the cat who licked the cream look.
    but the smell. I cannot believe that was me!!! Despite mints, perfume etc. It is on your clothes, hair and skin.
    They are now relaxed.. FIX DONE.
    It wont be long before the process repeats itself.
    Its a ritual that they MUST do.
    The nicotine monster wants to be fed.
    That is ALL they can think about.
    Consumes their minds.
    That is why I am FREE now. The STRESS of not having to feed that monster is gone.
    Smoking doesn't relieve stress it CAUSES STRESS.
    Done now. So good.✅

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