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I am smokefree for about 119 days. I was having trouble far into quitting and got into nicotine gum. It works with cravings better than patches, I believe. Although there are some side effects like vivid dreams, I don't mind. Smoking was hard enough with that, especially when caffeine was involved and harsh day-to-day experiences.
It is so good to be smokefree at 119 days though. I was laughing and waving my arm in the air just thinking about that. It is good and fulfilling to hit a goal. I am so capable now, I feel, to do what I need to do to have a good life with people around me who care. The doctors understand too which is the nicest thing. I feel, about doctors, like they just know when to go ahead and be a doctor. I have never run into one who was even slightly abusive or harassing in my life and for that, I am grateful. Or even nurse. Basically anyone involved in my doctor's office. I must be the rudest one... It is just funny. Not everyone has this experience.
There are things in the mix that made it better to try than before, such as my own motivation, plus I could feel it nagging at my health. It could seem like before it was completely an itch that could never be scratched and the fix could never really work out. I have no memories of that now. Like I am chewing on nicotine gum now, but I desire nothing else than gum.
I do not desire anything else than a general peaceful sense of area and a spontaneous something to happen. Like I would just like for myself to BE spontaneous for once in a long time. Quitting smoking was kind of spontaneous, but the way I saw it, it really wasn't. I can't think about it because then it wouldn't be spontaneous. I just feel awesome. I encourage people to quit for good because it is just healthy. Also your mentality and mental 'status' just gets better. And you will get through the side effects of quitting. They only last a while. Remember the cravings are the worst part of it and really only disastrous part that could ruin the whole thing.
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