2 months and 200 kilometers later..
So 2 months ago i decided to really try to stop smoking, i was sick and tired of being sick and tired. Each cigarette was draining away my energy, money and most importantly my confidence. the voice in my head that was telling me i was weak and useless got louder every day. After a horrible two years of upheavel in my personal life I needed a change.Cigarettes were the constant in my life through all the sh*t and to be honest i needed everyone of those smokes to stop me killing myself ( i don't say that lightly) I have smoked for over 30 years with "baby breaks". and i felt in order to let go of this really crap period in my life that i had shown in other areas how strong i could be,i just needed to let go of the associations with it and smoking. SO...i found myself an 8 week 10k running plan,up to that i had done a bit of 5k running and a tiathlon..all the time smoking. This time was different. i signed up for a Cancer charity Mo-vember run,joined a running forum,found a plan and focused. Some days i would run and want a ciggarette afterwards because it hadn't gone so well(insane) I realised in order to improve i would have to give up completely ,i made a deal,i wouldn't smoke until after the race(again,insane) Well yesterday was the race, i ran it non stop in just over an hour! NO WAY could i have done it if i'd continued to smoke, and guess what I don't want to,not that i'd say I won't ever again,you never know. But the thing that has been so important in this is how much help i have gotton from this site, i like many others had a slip up early days(a gift) It really is a day at a time but what i've learnt is tha if you have a plan,financial ,health or otherwise it really helps you focus, Thanks to all y buddies on the site. S x
Good on you Shasha. Your story resonates with me. I, too, showed that I could be very strong after some significant personal upheaval but I relied on cigarettes to get through that time. Then, just as you say, I realized I couldn't really respect myself if I didn't give quitting a TRY. I mean that - I just had to give my all to trying not to smoke and then I would have honoured myself. Like you, I have no intention, ever, to smoke again but I can never say never.
Amazing that you did the run in an hour and think how good you will feel for weeks and weeks just knowing that you rose to the challenge.
Together we will all get there.
Hi Shasha - what a great achievement - the race and the quitting! I am a new quitter (4th day today and going ok) and I have been reading a lot of the posts and stories here. A common thread is 'self-respect' - which we all subconsciously know we are abusing when we smoke so there is always that underlying self-loathing when we do it. Being smoke free is giving yourself your self-respect back.
Hi Shasha - well done. That you can do a 10km run so soon after having been a 30+ year smoker means you are in a relatively good place health wise and quitting now will have so many upsides for you. I agree with your comments about having a plan helps you focus. I am only on day 15 of my quit journey but have found if I write down my goals for each day (of which not smoking is at the top of the list) it goes a long way to helping me achieve them. Reading posts like yours help me know that I am not alone and others are doing it just as tougher (or even tougher) than I am and they are getting there. On a positive note, week one felt pretty ordinary, week two was absolutely awful at times but week three (so far) has gotten a lot easier for me. The posts of others who say it does get easier with time have really helped me hang in there and I am starting now to see it myself. I totally agree with you Daisy33 in regards to your comments about self respect.
Bravo Shasha that is amazing. Plans and goals are very important. I must say seeing your photo is a motivator (yuck). Here's to a smoke free rest of our lives (which will be longer now).
Well done Shasha.
Remember stick to it keep moving.. you can do it. Keep yourself busy. Create distractions for your mind, and stay quit! Best wishes!
