The first week...

I've tried to quit a few times now, all with the cut down method, all in vain. I attribute these lack of successes to not really wanting to quit: I found and still find smoking enjoyable and calming. The difference between now and then is previously, my motivation was friends and family telling me to quit and so I took that path in an effort to please them. Of course, the cost was another factor but it wasn't an important enough one to be a stand alone reason (which says something, as I'm by no means rich). The images of festering feet and cancer on the packets, funnily enough, only make me mad and do nothing to curb my desire; instead, I want to rebel- perhaps this has something to do with a faceless system of people trying to influence my personal choices. What triggered my desire to quit this time is I'm coughing like a madwoman and the smell of smoke of my hands and breath has disgusted me for months now. But the main thing is sometimes I can't sleep at night for the coughing, which makes me incredibly concerned and grumpy the next day. I think health reasons is the only reason strong enough to gather my willpower.

Until six days ago I smoked 10 a day and am trying to limit my intake to three a day so I don't go insane by not smoking at all. I'm sick at the moment which has been a great help (I shouldn't be smoking at all but I can't help it) as I feel the cravings far less when ill. I've read on this site that the withdrawal symptoms peak after four days- I've managed to keep to my target except last weekend when I was smoking like a chimney as I was drinking. For the next two weeks I will try not to drink in the hopes of getting rid of this (majorly enveloping) trigger. It has been about 6 days now that I've only smoked 2-3 (except last weekend :S). To keep to my goal I only smoke at high trigger times like after a meal or when I get home from work, when I cannot shake the urge no matter what. I used to smoke before work but I cut that out which is already one cigarette less. I also try to say no during lunchbreaks and leave the three for after work to ensure I don't go over. From what I've read I think the next two weeks will be the hardest and I know the cravings get less over time; I'm clinging to this fact to help me along, there is light at the end of the tunnel!!