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NOPE-2021
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28/07/2021
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Monday quit day - Resetting the clock!

Posted in Quit experiences 01 Aug 2021
15 Comments

For the last 3 weeks, I have made a feeble attempt to quit smoking. At first I did well, then a puff here and there, then a day without a puff... I still continued to count those days still as quit days, however, I'm not fooling anyone. A puff here and there means I am still "feeding the monster" so to say.

I am here in the US and it is Saturday evening. My quit day will be Monday. Even though I am smoking a minimal amount compared to my half to whole pack a day, I still have not truly started on my journey.

I am somewhat of a "closet smoker" and am tired of the mints, gum and breath spray, fabric spray for my clothes and constantly washing my hair. Of course, deep down I think everyone knows anyway. I go all day at work without a single cigarette believe it or not. Only one other person in my area smokes and I see him going out in stormy weather just to get that fix. In my mind I feel sorry for him and have some pity but also in my mind, I have that same pity for myself.

I too am so hooked I have smoked in corners during storms (not at work) and I have always had a fear of not having enough in the house when a storm is approaching. How pathetic am I ??? (And stupid !!!) I have passed on gatherings with friends because I know I would have to go for hours without a cigarette, being the "closet" smoker that I am.

I am getting tired of having multiple "Day One's"! Now is the time, and I thought if I were to post my intensions that maybe it will "stick" this time. I am a "young" 63 year old and have smoked most of my life. I can imagine what my insides look like. Both my parents smoked and my mother died of lung cancer and my father of a heart attack. Well duh,,, How STUPID am I??? They passed years ago and I did not get the hint, I was and am an addict to a drug,... nicotine. It's too bad it is not illegal as I think that would make me, and perhaps others quit.

I have read the Allen Carr book, I have read tons of your stories here. You are all amazing and your stories provide encouragement and comradery. I know it is all in the mind and a matter of getting in the right mindset.

My apologies for rambling. I selected my NOPE-2021 name in honor of all of you. You all have put that to practice and I intend to do the same. My Day One is Monday!!! Thank you again my friends :) Not One Puff Ever!!!

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15 Comments

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  • Percy Verence August 01, 2021 | 10:52
    Hello, Nope!

    I'm right at the beginning of the journey, too. (Day 3)

    I also have hundreds of 'Day 1's in my rear view mirror. I'm not seeing this as a negative any more - it's just taken this amount of dress rehearsal and practice to get it right in the end.

    I have been a nicotine junkie since the age of fifteen - and now I'm fifty. I have spent less than three years of my adult life as a non-smoker. Yes, we can beat ourselves up about our own stupidity - or we could extend the same compassion to ourselves that we find for other people. Smoking is insidious - it was socially acceptable in our lifetimes. Nobody stages an intervention for a smoker in the way they would for a heroin addict - it's a drug that permits us to function normally whilst it robs us of our health, hard-earned money and years ahead. Stopping smoking is always something we plan to do in the future...and the years tend to roll by with the habit unchallenged...that's how we got to this point.

    Don't hate yourself. 'This is it' this time because you WANT it to be.

    Good luck and I look forward to you sharing your journey x
  • Robn August 01, 2021 | 15:23

    Hi Nope...can’t change the past, but we can change and improve the future. I smoked for 48 years and never thought I could break the addiction. I am just over three years quit and truly it is the best damn thing I have ever done for myself. More money in my pocket, more energy, more confidence and a value for myself that I never had before. This can be your last quit if you want it to be. Want it more than you want to smoke and you will be free...the struggle is short.... so look forward to the ride, meet it head on and you will get through more easily.. you can do this....believe in yourself.
  • NOPE-2021 August 01, 2021 | 22:56
    Thank you for your responses of pure support. I have to say, I have great encouragement each time I look at this site and see the new posts of success. 3 years, 6 weeks, 12 days, 3 months, 9 weeks,... WoW!

    This just gives me more desire, especially the ones that say how better life can be without the nasty addiction.

    My quit day is tomorrow and I think my mind is in a good place. Percy, I too look forward to hearing how your journey is doing as I will be a bit behind you but hopeful to follow in your footsteps!
  • Happiness August 02, 2021 | 0:35
    It has been a delightful morning reading all the success stories and supportive comments. It does help to know that you are not alone. We can relate to each other and give each other encouragement through our stories. Keep them coming!

    NOPE-2021 you are armed and ready. You know already how nicotine interferes with life. There are no pros only cons.......smoking never did anything....only took. When we can see this truth clearly we can make the conviction to change...much more easily...Welcome this opportunity and know you will never regret it. Know that you can fo this. You will soon be your own master.
  • NOPE-2021 August 02, 2021 | 1:06
    Thank you Happiness! Amen to that!!!
  • Red-67 August 02, 2021 | 1:38
    It can be as easy as you make it. Open your mind to the truth about the addiction to smoking, and it can be easy to just stop wanting it. Wanting to quit if fine, but NOT WANTING to smoke makes it easy. You CAN accept the physical withdrawal without making it a craving..
  • NOPE-2021 August 02, 2021 | 1:50
    Thanks Red. I have read many of your posts. "Takes one to know one" and I know, YOU know! After all the years you have been a non-smoker, you still come back to this site to support people like me. You lift my spirits,.. you rock! All of you are saying touching words that I am open to hearing.

    Before I even joined this site, it seemed like some of you were already talking to "me" personally. I do truly wish that I can get some non-smoking time behind me and encourage people on their first days as well.

    Thank you again my friends.
  • Jessfreeof, Northern NSW August 02, 2021 | 6:56
    All the best for Monday 😊
  • NOPE-2021 August 02, 2021 | 7:49
    Thanks Jess,...YOU too are an inspiration to me!!! I've read about your successful journey. GO GIRL !!!
  • Leeann , Central Coast August 02, 2021 | 13:22
    Welcome NOPE, the past is the past we cannot change the silliness that we slaved ourselves feeding the addiction. I agree 100% and wish they would make them illegal and stop selling them. Keep busy and focused, you can do this, look at all the winners on this site that have kicked the putrid habit to the kerb!!! Im only in the early days, day 13 i think, and ive had that many falls its embarrasing. Anywho I refuse to give up the fight to be free!!
  • NOPE-2021 August 02, 2021 | 19:44
    Thank you Leeann. Today is Monday and I am ready! Getting ready for work and I find I am eager. Day 13 is really something to be proud of. Keep it going. I hope to follow in your footsteps too. You seem to have a positive attitude and thanks,... yes,... the past is the past. Onward to the future! Have a good smokeless week!
  • Percy Verence August 03, 2021 | 3:07
    Hi, Nope!

    Just wanted to wish you every success for today. I'm only on 'Day 5' so I can keep you company in Quit Kindergarten!

    Today has been great. Day 3 & 4 was a bit more of a struggle - I spent most of my time in the fridge! :0 Relaxed, comfortable and feeling very positive today.

    Hope your day is going well (I'm in UK and it's just after six in the evening here) and I look forward to following your progress. x
  • Red-67 August 03, 2021 | 4:32
    Hey girl :)
    Where in the States are you ? I'm a south Mississippi redneck.. The good kind, not the beer drinking wife beating backwards cap idiot. LOOL
    It's Monday, Tuesday down under, :) Let us know how you are doing..
    Remember,, You simply do NOT WANT one. The withdrawal will pass. You may feel like you're going to die, but you won't. I'm sure, you have felt worse with a case of the flu. You CAN do this. After 45+ years of smoking, my wife did not even know I had quit for over 2 weeks. I smoked outside, and still had a pack, ashtray, and lighter by my chair, but I had disposed of my butt can :) I would still go out with my coffee, or bourbon, as always, and just made up my mind that I did not want the smoke.. Stick with it, You will LOVE being FREE :)
  • Happiness August 04, 2021 | 1:51
    Day 2 for you and you are winning the battle. Keep thinking positive and keep going forward. It IS worth it and YOU are worth it. An opportunity of a life time, all you have to do is CHOOSE it!
  • NOPE-2021 August 04, 2021 | 8:18
    Yes,.. it is day 2 for me. It's about 6 pm and day 2 is close to being over. I don't feel too bad, BUT I don't feel good either! I'm not sneaking in any puffs like the prior 3 weeks I "pretended" to quit. This time I need it to be "real".

    Yes Percy,.. looks like you, Leeann and I are in the same Kindergarten, with me being the "newbie". You two are doing great and I hope to do as well.

    My mind sometimes drifts wondering what life will be like as a non-smoker. At the moment, as a non-smoker, life is not yet tip top to say the least. However, reading all the posts saying how great they feel and how no one regrets quitting gets me excited about my future. One day at a time,.. one hour at a time.

    To answer your question Red, I live in the smallest state in the US,.. Rhode Island. I live on Aquidneck Island which is a small island and part of Rhode Island. I'm happy here but would like to escape the winters. However, as a non-smoker, maybe winters will be better seeing I won't have to sneak shelter outside just to get my nicotine fix!!! (Not many people smoke in their homes around here).

    Today is almost over and it is onto day 3!!! Yippee!

    NOPE!! (Big name to live up to, but I am up for the challenge!)

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